Nicolas Sarkozy missed the arrival of his daughter Giulia. So does the father have to be at the birth?

Could any work meeting be more important than attending the birth of your baby? Nicolas Sarkozy missed his child's birth last week, then spent only half an hour with his wife Carla Bruni and their daughter Giulia in a clinic in Paris before returning to Frankfurt to meet Angela Merkel. What's a president to do?

Opinion in France is divided on Sarkozy missing the main event. In France men are just as likely to attend the birth of their child as they are in the UK. Which is to say, it is extremely rare for them not to. But cultural attitudes on privacy are different. Some sections of the French media ignored the event. Le Monde simply carried an article analysing the foreign press's obsession with the first lady's pregnancy. Elsewhere, though, it was seen as surprising that Sarkozy had missed his daughter's birth to attend eurozone crisis talks in Germany. Was this a sign of commitment too far?

Yes, says Tina Cassidy, the US writer of Birth: A History (Chatto & Windus): "A father is now expected to witness the birth of his child, even if he is the president of France. A father's presence is firmly cemented in our culture. The only time you ever hear of a father missing a birth is among professional athletes who are travelling and cannot get there in time."

To choose work – however high-level – over family is seen as controversial. Last November, former footballer John Barnes was in a TV studio commentating on a Chelsea-Liverpool match as his wife gave birth to their seventh child. He was ridiculed online – but also hailed as a "real man". In 2008, Chelsea goalkeeper Petr Cech played in a semi-final rather than flying to Prague to be by his labouring wife's side. And Gordon Ramsay has famously missed the births of all four of his children because he feared his sex life "would be damaged by images like something out of a sci-fi movie".

These are (alpha?) men with extraordinary jobs, perhaps. Regular expectant dads do not miss their babies' births. Last year a survey of 5,300 mothers by Oxford University found that 89% of women said their partners had attended the birth; 61% reported that the man went to ante–natal checks. NHS figures reported by the Fatherhood Institute suggest that 98% of fathers are present at the birth.